Polarities: Moving From the Limitations of “Either/Or” to the Power of “Both/And” | 2025 FOX Family Forum
Overview
The world in which we live is tumultuous and increasingly polarized. It is timely and essential for leaders at every level to see conflicting perspectives and contrasting value systems as opportunities, not obstacles. That is why we need to understand and leverage Polarities.
The human brain knows how to make choices. We make hundreds of them every day. Some are easy: "Which route should I take to work today?" Others are harder: "Is it more important to attend this work event or my daughter's soccer game?" Deciding what to do requires "Either / Or" thinking, an essential skill that allows us to take action and not feel paralyzed by indecision.
Either / Or thinking works well most of the time. It falls short when faced with a Polarity. Polarities exist where a "Both / And" mindset is necessary to thrive. Humans require both activity and rest to be productive. Family offices depend on both continuity and change for effective succession planning. These scenarios require "Both / And" thinking because they involve a special kind of opposites, where the path to success requires benefits of both. Choosing only one will produce repeated conflict or failure. Polarities teach us to know when to shift from the Either / Or thinking our brains instinctively prefer to a Both / And mindset. Polarities are all around us — we just haven't been trained to spot them, until now.
Betsy Miller, Lecturer on Law, Harvard Law School